Hey Tariq,
Seemingly not a bad effort put in here. I'm not too clear what you're getting at though; your introduction briefed us on things that ruin highschool and the likes, and hereon you're talking about vampires and such. If this is a parallelism to evil, forgive me if I sound dense. I do, also, understand if you're using vampires as a metaphor.
However! I can't say for certain what this makes me think. I'm not sure; it gave off a different impression than your intro. I think that instead of focusing on such a big issue as a whole, Tariq, you should take time and focus on one tiny part at a time. Remember, as I said to you, it's a matter of self reflection.
June
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Reviews: 1464
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